The story of my eyebrows

Being Asian has its pros and cons. Not burning under sunlight is a pro. Having sparse eyebrows is a total con. As the saying goes, the eyes is the window to the soul. And you can't see mine, I look half asleep most of the time eventhough I'm wide awake.

I am a total chicken when it comes to pain and I do know a lot of individuals that enjoys pain. Not the  bad kind or 50 shades kinda pain.

Late 2005, I got a job that requires a lot of ICI painting on the face. And I tell myself, I will not fucking draw my brows every single morning, not with my makeup skill. So I build up my courage and went to Ultimate Impressions now known as Bluunis for eyebrows embroidery. I paid RM300 plus to get the job done. It was not very painful (still bearable to me) but my eyes kept tearing. And the girl kept selling me shit, saying that my skin requires this and that. I did not pay for their telemarketing skill either. So I shut her up and tell her I'm here only for the eyebrows that I do not want nothing else. I couldn't care less about my skin and I still don't, so she can save her saliva for other customers that is looking for the elixir to immortality.

I was happy with the result then but was told that I need to go back within 3 months for a touch up. WTF? I thought it's just a one off thing for life. And so after the touch up, I did not go back for any shit. And left my brows to suffer and thinned and reddish. Well, I thought it blends with my hair colour.

Fast forward to Year 2012 (the end of the world), my boss suddenly brought up this matter and said that my brows look like shit. Oh God! I didn't know that I look like shit. I thought I look fab with my hairless brows. Haha...

I gave a call to my former torturer and was told that after 7 years, the price jumped up to double. It fucking costs RM600 plus to get the same shit done. I'm not fucking paying that amount of money for beauty. I rather spend it on cameras and films. And the girl on the other end of the phone starts selling me this and that and I should make an appointment to avoid disappointment. Well, I'm disappointed to waste RM600 on that so I'm not worry about that. I end the conversation with shitloads of nonsense.

I asked around (those with nice brows) and found out that a dodgy place is willing to do it for RM350. I'm up for it as long as I look awake and they sterilize their equipment. And so she made us appointments, she needed a touch up.

Took half day leave and went to the dodgy place in Jalan Ipoh. Waited another 2 hours or so despite having an appointment. The place is popular! It's a good sign. And everyone came out with beautiful sets of brows. I'm glad!

Got my hair clipped up to expose my non-existent brows. Tsk tsk tsk... it's red. I look like Ronald McDonald's girlfriend. An assistant came over and turbo plucked my brows (ouch!) and told me that I've over plucked mine. And that I've been wrongly plucking my brows all my fucking life. I didn't know that you only pluck below the brows and nothing above it. I am truly fucked!

The lady boss (Taiwanese knows their shit) came over and drew mine while another customer (a nosy bitch) who was at that time lying down on the bed turn around and looked at mine. I wanted to scream at her to mind her own brows. But I didn't and so I kept my mouth shut. I waited around more and was finally summoned to lie on the bed. OMFG! It makes me wanna pee.

I looked at the lady boss and told her that I'm scared. I think she has seen enough chicken shits in her lifetime and assured me that it's gonna be okay and it's not very painful. Duh! She starts to work on it and I just kept my eyes closed the whole time. According to researchers in Ah-meh-ri-cah, if you don't look at it, it will be less painful. It's true! OMG! They are geniuses! What a revelation.

Mine took forever because I have unbalanced brows. Basically, everything about me are unbalanced including my mind, nope especially my mind. She was super professional and I love the end results. It looks natural and most of the time it looks horribly dark and scary. I was told that I need to go back in a month time to get a touch up.

And I want to end this by saying, " I have brows"